The Hof,Norris and now-Luke Watson!

Luke Watson is deadlier than Chuck Norris. He’s had more media exposure than the Hoff. Apart from being a phenomenal rugby player and the single force attributed by many to Western Provinces current form blitz on the Currie Cup, Luke Watson is fast becoming the most written about man in the South African media.

                                                   Even the photographer shat himself!   

Luke1.jpg

A day does not go by on this site, and on all our inferior competitors and alternative forms of media publications, that Watsongate is not smeared in your face. Jake White and his selectors simply refuse to select this phenomenon, BUT – little do they know…

Some Luke Watson Facts

  • If you can see Luke Watson, he can see you. If you can’t see Luke Watson, you may be seconds away from a bone crunching, career ending speartackle.
  • Luke Watson does not sleep. He does Auckland Grids and tackles unlicensed minibus taxis.
  • The chief export of Luke Watson is turnover ball…and pain.
  • There are no disabled rugby players. Only rugby players who have met Luke Watson.
  • Tana Umaga and Jason Robinson retired in their prime because they believed Jake would pick Luke Watson earlier.

Feel free to add some more Luke Watson facts…

31 Comments so far

  1. Nostradamus @ August 10th, 2006

    Luke Watson uses pictures of Jake White for toiletpaper (so do I)

    Luke sleeps with his pillow under his rugby togs

    Luke Watson drinks 150 Prozac and 200 Sleeping tablets before every game, for fear of hurting his opponents too badly

    It is calculated that Luke Watson will reach his prime by July, 2047

  2. barter @ August 10th, 2006

    The last time Luke Watson was dropped from a team, he created the Spears

    Luke Watson once completed the Le Mans 24 Hour race in 12 hours

    Luke Watson once regurgitated Ollie le Roux

    Luke Watson doesn’t have a lucky rabbit’s foot, he plays with Marius Hurter in his pocket

    Luke Watson told Chuck Norris to grow a beard.

    Luke Watson can speak braille

    Luke Watson urine sample once tested positive for steriods - after which his reaction was simply to laugh and ask the scientists: “What do you think steriods are made off

  3. enders @ August 10th, 2006

    You guys are fkn hillarious!!! Nice one!! Keep em coming!!

  4. Nostradamus @ August 11th, 2006

    Luke Watson calculated Pi to the last decimal.

    Luke Watson eats Kryptonite Red for breakfast

    John Smit and Jake White uses their personalities for contraception (oops, wrong topic)

    The reason Jake does not pick Luke Watson, is because he is petrified of saying ‘Luke Watson’

    Luke Watson does not sleep… he waits.

    It is said that Luke Watson is responsible for the extinction of the Dynosaur.

  5. chud @ August 11th, 2006

    Luke is a dinosaur

  6. chud @ August 11th, 2006

    If luke is in the media so much, why do u have such a kak picture of him??? :lol:

  7. Nostradamus @ August 11th, 2006

    There are always idiots who dislike pure genius!

    One for chud: Luke is so terrifying, even the dark is afraid of him!

  8. Nostradamus @ August 11th, 2006

    And, chud. The photo is so bad because the photographer shat himself when Luke saw him taking photos

  9. chud @ August 14th, 2006

    Think the lens started to crack because of his ugly mug.

  10. chud @ August 14th, 2006

    Solly Tjibilika uses ribbed condoms inside out, so he gets the pleasure.

    Solly’s tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

    When Solly has sex with a man, it is not because he is gay, but because he has run out of women.

    Macquyver can build an airplane out of gum and paper clips, but Solly can kill him and take it.

    Solly once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.

    Solly doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

    If you ask Solly what time it is, he always says, “Two seconds till.” After you ask, “Two seconds to what?” he roundhouse kicks you in the face.

    Solly only masturbates to pictures of Solly.

  11. chud @ August 14th, 2006

    Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did

  12. chud @ August 14th, 2006

    Solly does not sleep. He waits

  13. chud @ August 14th, 2006

    Solly recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull

  14. Nostradamus @ August 14th, 2006

    Solly wie?

    Jy moet sê ’solly’ dat jy soveel k*k praat

  15. chud @ August 14th, 2006

    SOLLY. Die einste solly wat veroorsaak dat George Smith gedrop word.

  16. Speartackle @ August 14th, 2006

    Hillarious Chud!!!!! Solly v Watson!! A regular Hof v Norris affair!! Lekker!!

  17. chud @ August 15th, 2006

    One time while sparring with Wolverine, Solly accidentally lost his left testicle. You might be familiar with it to this very day by its technical term: Jupiter.

    Contrary to popular belief, Solly, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth. Within 3 minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans, and the feeling of being repeatedly tackled through a car windshield.

    Solly is Luke Skywalker’s real father.

    Solly does not use spell check. If he happens to misspell a word, Oxford will simply change the actual spelling of it.

    Before science was invented it was once believed that autumn occurred when Solly tackled every tree in existence.

  18. Nostradamus @ August 17th, 2006

    chud, how long have you and solly been an item?
    Only someone deeply in love can get so carried away over someone so insignificant.

    Now if you sang King Luke’s praises, anyone could understand because he has more talent in his left pinkie than 250 Solly Tibylikas!

  19. chud @ August 17th, 2006

    You just wait till aj klaps Luke at the tank and the we can talk again. If luke Twatson has a awesome game……..i will agree with all of you. If not then my suspicions about aqua man is with reason.

  20. enders @ August 17th, 2006

    aqua-man???

  21. Nostradamus @ August 17th, 2006

    Not only is he such a great player, he is also good looking enough to be Aqua man!

    And, chud… A few weeks ago you said that you will start to support Luke. What happened?

    no one as blind as he who do not want to see..

  22. chud @ August 17th, 2006

    Enders, aqua man is the coolest super hero of all time. He could speak to fish(i know its so cool).
    I know i said i will start to support him but i never said when. Like i said my decision follows the SHARKS vs wp.

  23. enders @ August 17th, 2006

    You guys crack me up!

    chud - you definetely have what it takes to write for the SinBin - Nostradamus too…..send me something if you like….enders@sarugby.com

  24. Nostradamus @ August 17th, 2006

    Ha ha, thanks enders. Nothing like a bit of rivalry over the greatest flank on the planet to get the creative juices to flow.

    Please just don’t allow chud to write without being able to edit… he will bore everybody to death singing the praises of relics like AJ Venter and John ‘the snail’ Smit!

    Regards,

    Nostra

  25. Speartackle @ August 17th, 2006

    hahaha

    Why don’t you two each give 100 words on who you think should be the loose forward trio for the Boks and email Enders…..enders, you then combine these two mad mens 100 words for an objective view???

    I’d read it!!!!!

  26. chud @ August 18th, 2006

    I can write till my fingers bleed why not to include Luke. Can i send you that :lol:

  27. Nostradamus @ August 18th, 2006

    Luke sal vir aj met sy poepol doodknyp.

  28. chud @ August 22nd, 2006

    Trust luke to stick foreign objects up his bum. Guess thats what the cape does to you. It’s been fashion there since 1920. aaaaa! Cape own our very own San Fransico

  29. Nostradamus @ August 23rd, 2006

    Ouch chud! Watch out, your very own pocket rocket(nudge nudge wink wink)is from Cape Town originally.

  30. chud @ August 23rd, 2006

    thats why he left, and thats why luke went back
    hahahahaha man i never looked at it that way

  31. Zandman @ October 14th, 2006

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